My friend lives in Scotland and is happy…

She chose to live here after a life time of wandering and looking for a society where she could be herself. Has she found what she was looking for? Well, let me tell you her story and then you will be able to decide for yourselves.

She was born in a country that underwent huge changes and collapsed. When she was twelve, her country ceased to exist and she had to leave to find a new home with her parents. And that’s just the beginning of her story. Was it easy for her and her parents to start a new life in a country not that different from the one she grew up in? No. It never is. especially if you are considered an enemy just because of your country of birth.

Not knowing the language, without any friends ( it’s difficult to make friends if you cannot communicate easily and people aren’t very keen on becoming your friends to find one ), bullied and disrespected because of who she was, she had lived her teenage life and youth in a country that had made it clear it would never become her fatherland but a mediocre substitute, a step-fatherland if anything like that could exist. I am saying this with a guilt and shame because it’s my country of origin. Despite all those experiences, she gave that country everything she could possibly give. She was a great student, respected other people and the law knowing she would not get the same in return. She worked very hard and finished her Masters degree.

Along the way she had met someone… And here you’d think the story should end with a happy ever after. It doesn’t.

They met at university and fell in love. But it was a forbidden love. The kind of love that prudish people frown upon and Catholics stone you for it. In a country where most people declare to be catholic that kind of love is never happy. So they tried to deny it and give each other a chance for ‘a normal life’. But love conquers it all and triumphs in the end! And so they left their promising careers at university and stopped thinking about their PhDs. Instead they chose a life together without constant looking over their shoulder, making sure that no one from work sees them kiss or hold hands.

They came to Scotland. They chose happiness. They got married and have a son. Because they did not have a very good English when they came here, they had to start climbing the ladder of social and economic success from the very bottom. Ten years later they talk about their family openly and hold hands in public. Their son is their greatest love and joy. Do they still fear prejudice and human intolerance and our capability to hate if we don’t understand? What do you think?

I’m afraid there are still many people quick with their words of hatred. If only they were as quick with their empathy and compassion toward other people.

Both of these women are wonderful human beings, amazing parents, fantastic friends, dedicated employees and extremely compassionate people.

I admire you both for who you are and what you do! Together we will change the world!